Jun Dishes

verb/diSH/ : food or sex or gossip or fiction in real life

Survey Says: Motherhood

BlogQuestion

Motherhood. I’m new to it. But anyone in my family will tell you that I wanted to be a mother since I was able to write my own name.

On the surface, it’s everything I thought it would be. Movies and sitcoms and books about babies are great that way.

On the surface, it’s everything I knew it would be. Friends and family and colleagues with babies somehow pave the way that way.

On the surface, it’s everything I hoped it would be. Dreams and fantasies, as a little girl, of one day having a baby of my own made me whole that way.

Some of my warm and fuzzy realities about motherhood have been covered before…

GigglesWithNoah

But under the surface, these are some of my cold and even stubbly realities of motherhood:

I don’t wax or shave at the first sign of hair growth anymore. I no longer cry about every little bump and bruise and cut I suffer. I don’t lunge for my bottle of my nail polish to touch-up whatever chip appears on my finger or toenails, like I used to. I don’t get to finish half the things I’ve started on any given day.

No. I choose not to.

I choose not to wax or shave or cry or lunge or finish things, because it’s not really a choice. My baby comes first. But for some there is no choice, motherhood.

All fun and jokes aside my experience on Big Brother has put me in touch with so many people, all at once, but through the course of ten years. It’s almost like taking the number of people I knew in 2003 and multiplying it by some arbitrary, but three-digit number, and all of a sudden I know that many more of this or that kind of person. As many fans as there are of Big Brother, there are that many individual stories behind each.

Through shared stories, I’ve come to know mothers and fathers and grandparents oh my. And also, so many good people who struggle in their wish to become parents. In 2003 when I knew not yet what motherhood was, I couldn’t have written exactly what I’m writing now. But now that I do know what it is, I never take for granted the fact that I can make such choices. Choosing to clip Noah’s toenails in lieu of polishing my own. Or crying inside for just a split-second when my head meets a shelf, because heating up Noah’s bottle is more important, at the crack of dawn. Or singing or eating oranges or anything else Noah loves to do, instead of waging war on my Brazilian bikini line half-naked in the bathroom.

I choose to do everything I do for Noah, and for my husband and for me, as mother and wife and woman hear me roar. And because my social media reach has afforded me the opportunity to see way more than what’s sitting right in front of my nose, I am that much more aware and ever more grateful for the realities of motherhood. Of parenthood, something that should never be taken for granted.

I know so many good people who would only cherish it just this way.

Always dishing,

Jun

Posted under: Reality Dishes

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18 comments

  • Nice! I have heard other new mothers talk about how having this new life to raise & nurture has done more to make them less selfish or self-centered than all the self improvement books combined. Always enjoy reading your thoughts & opinions.

    Do you think you’ll be one of those mom’s that try to keep your son sheltered & innocent or do you want him to be exposed to the good & bad in life at an early age? I think a decent argument could be made for both.

    • I know what you mean. And I’d say I’m still selfish, but in a different way anyway :)

      I will keep Noah safe but not too sheltered…my parents sheltered me but I chose my own path from a super young age hahaha. Nothing like making mistakes to teach you life’s lessons!

  • What is great also about having so many twitter followers is that when Noah starts toddling it can get frustrating and sometimes lonely. You will never feel that you are the only one saying NO to your son every three seconds. Many of us will let you know we understand and relate by experience. We will also rejoice with you, big time, when he can climb into his car seat by himself.

    • Yes! I mean, I knew they would. But when I sit and actually think about it, I can’t believe just how much my priorities have changed :)

    • Hmmmmm, I know what you mean by isolating. It’s funny, I never thought one day I’m be a mom, leaning on other moms through Twitter :)

  • Dambit! I can’t remember my login and I guess not even my username. I know where I get email notices but that didn’t work either. I’m losing my mind faster than before. It’s GAYTOR. 😉

    Now you have gone and done it. and so early in my morning. It’s not even 8 AM here.

    I’d never thought of hairy Jun Parts and never really wanted or intended to. You know I like thinking about other parts and shaving them too… someone else’s that is… Know any volunteers?

    Now the vision is stuck in my mind and I’m not sure what it will take to get it washed away, never to be thought of again. :-p

    But all kidding aside. You approached a subject I had never thought about but I do understand how it comes about. My children may not have been human but I was Daddy to the 3 greatest kids in the world, Marlene, Austin and Oscar. (Actually Austin was my grandson but still a child.

    Don’t get me wrong. I am in no way comparing our precious Noah (yes, he belongs to all of us in a way) but it’s the closest thing I can come to in trying to relate. Noah does and now will always come first. and that’s the way it should be. Knowing the side of you I do know over the past few years led me to think you would never settle down to marriage and baby(s) but now that it has happened you, like everything else you do, you do it perfectly. That’s our Jun, period. You don’t do anything half way and that’s just one more reason I/we adore and admire you. <3

  • Now that I published and then proofed my comment (I never seem to remember to proof before I hit the magic button) it sounds a bit/lot mushy but I think you know how to read between my lines by now and understand the true intention of the things I said. :-/

    • I love you mushy and not mushy and everything in between. Can you believe I’m married with a kid?!?!?!?! Sometimes it still makes me go “WOAH” HAHAHAHA! Love that we still keep in touch like this my GaYToR!

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