Pesky Neighbors

We’ve all had them, some of us have them now, pesky neighbors.

If South Korea, the landmass, had a voice I’m sure it would refer to North Korea as a pesky neighbor. The two countries, which were once one, are mere neighbors forever more. South Korea, as a people, generally treat North Korea as somewhat of an abstraction of the oppressed. My own mother, refers to Kim Jong Un as a “crazy mofo” in Korean and that’s the end of that. Neither she nor I care to talk politics. But when our small country of South Korea is in the news alongside the U.S. and North Korea, it’s bothersome.

North Korea is a pesky neighbor.

Crazy mofo aside, how is North Korea still getting away with bluff after bluff? It’s 2013, yet North Korea is still crying wolf by way of antiquated threats of nuclear warfare. It’s like dealing with a child, in this case Kim Jong Un, who is but a pudgy mirror of his eternalized North Korean father freak and just as petulant.

If North Korea, the landmass, had a voice I’m sure it would refer to South Korea as it’s other half. North Korea, as a people, wear a shell in the public eye and not by choice but for survival. So many years have passed and so many families died out never having had the chance to reconnect with family just across a parallel. Blood is supposed to be thicker than water, but not thick enough to conquer the divide between the Koreas.

If Aesop were here to write a fable about it all, what would happen to Kim Jong Un?


~ ~ ~

There once was a fat tyrannical boy, Kim Jong Un, who was bored as he sat on his jelly ass watching his nation’s people starve. To amuse himself he took a great breath and sang out, “I’m gonna blow you up America! And you too South Korea! Nuclear warfare!”

The world’s news outlets came running up the hill to see if the boy would blow anything up, least of all a balloon god forbid he’d be out of breath so fast. But when they arrived at the top of the hill, they found nothing. The boy laughed at the sight of their faces and subsequent news coverage.

“Don’t cry nuclear warfare, stupid boy,” said everyone, “when you have nothing!” They went grumbling back down the hill.

Later, the plump little rat Kim Jong Un sang out again, “I’m gonna blow you up America! And you too South Korea! Nuclear warfare!” To his naughty delight, he watched as everyone again came running up the hill to see.

When they saw nothing they sternly said, “Save your father’s song for when there is really something wrong! Don’t cry ‘nuclear warfare’ when there is nothing!”

But Kim Jong Un just grinned and watched them go grumbling down the hill once more.

Later that night, in a dream, Kim Jong Un dreamt he was eaten by a wolf, had a heart attack and died in his sleep.

Or something like that.

Always dishing, Jun


  1. Anonymous

    Jun- your fable is amazing! You difinitely have a gift for the written word. And for saying what we are thinking. You always nail it . Now if only the wolf would come…..

  2. GaYToR

    Love your ‘fable’ but that child does worry me. I also have to wonder what our own little freak child may have said to stir him up while shooting hoops. Dennis Rodman is coo coo too.

    Interesting that on ABC’s World News Tonight that little Un was compared to be more like his grandfather than his father, even citing his hair style.


Feel Free to Dish!