Too Much Information. What does that even mean? There is no “one” blanket measurement representing what “TMI” is, because it’s different for everyone. For one person, my tweeting about steamed mushrooms smelling like fresh semen might be TMI. Yet for another it might not be. Potato-potahto, TMI is who I am. I just put it out there and there’s no taking it back, and you do with it what you want.
But TMI isn’t always bad. TMI can be a learning experience too. I’d always wished someone had told me:
1. How terrifying the first poop is after having a baby, because the stitches from where they cut your vagina open “just a little” still feels tender to the touch. I had cold sweats sitting on the toilet that fateful day because I convinced myself that pushing poop out of my anus would make my vagina’s stitches burst open, and I’d lose blood and poop and faint and crack my head and countless other bad things. None of that happened because I did everything I was supposed to do…lots of fiber and produce and staying hydrated…elevating my knees a little with a stool under my feet as I sat there terrified on the toilet with my eyes closed. Just don’t force it I had thought. TMI? Not for me.
2. What to expect from foreskin on an uncircumcised penis for the first time. Whether or not it’s expected, I’ve always been surprised at how cold the foreskin is. Like, literally cold. And watch out for salty cold foreskin. I know…TMI, but maybe not.
3. What losing a mucus plug felt and looked like in detail. Because the cramps accompanying the “unplugging” felt like a golf club digging into my abdomen, and the mucus plug itself was unlike any kind of mucus I’d ever come across in my vagina.
What’s a mucus plug? Oh, it’s a tablespoon-sized literal plug of mucus sealing your cervix that ends up smeared with blood when you’re going into labor. Of course I took a photo of it, but never tweet the photo. And I never will because to me, that’s TMI.
But I did show it to the labor and delivery nursing students who helped me through nine hours together, because they’d never seen a mucus plug before. To them, it wasn’t TMI but a learning experience. Crazy how the whole TMI thing works.