Jun Dishes

verb/diSH/ : food or sex or gossip or fiction in real life

Hate versus Tragedy

On our drive to Holland this past Monday morning, my husband Davy and I heard a story on the radio about two little brothers from Holland who’d gone missing earlier this month. Their bodies were found that morning, in a swampy ditch, where they had been hidden for two weeks. They were 9 and 7, and their father had killed them before hanging himself. Those were the exact details shared on the radio and it hit me hard, just like it’s probably hitting you now. Facts about life don’t compare to the harsher reality of facts about death.


I don’t often cover news of this nature here on my site, but this story hit me the way it did because I was able to understand every word of Dutch. Davy didn’t have to translate any of it for me, and he knew that as he watched me listen and react. The language barrier I experienced after moving here has diminished drastically, and it makes life as an expat easier, but hearing about little Ruben and Julian made me realize there’s really no such thing as a language barrier for tragedy.

With so much loss in the world every day, be it a Ruben or Julian or Lee Rigby, hate has shown us time and time again that it does not discriminate. Neither does love nor cancer, but hate is what’s all over the news. Although there’s a cure for it nobody has been able to provide it to the masses, and so hate lives on.

A man’s hate for his ex-wife led him to take the life of their two beautiful young boys and then his own. All of them will be missed for different reasons and by so many, and remembered by many less but forever. If love is supposed to be patient and kind, then hate is merciless and monstrous.

I wish for Ruben and Julian that they are holding each other again and safe in their souls as all children should be. I wish for their mother, Iris, so much love and patience and kindness for as long as she needs. I wish for the small town of Cothens, where the boys were from, strength in bouncing back from such loss.

I wish I didn’t have to understand the language of hate, but news must be reported and translated for us to understand its tragedy.

R.I.P. Ruben and Julien

Always dishing,


Posted under: Reality Dishes

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  • Unfortunately, the language of hate is universal. But so is the language of love. I firmly believe that love is overwhelmingly the dominant human language. I feel sorry for people who live their lives with such negativity.

    • Jun Song on May 24, 2013 at 2:29 pm said:


      I believe that too Richard, if it wasn’t for love being bigger this world be a very worse-off place.

  • kcsmum on May 24, 2013 at 1:31 pm said:


    Poor little guys. So many precious babies become the pawns of warring parents. If only we could find a way to reach them.

    • Jun Song on May 24, 2013 at 2:28 pm said:


      Family services were aware of the unhealthy situation here, but something like this happened anyway. It’s unimaginable until it happens, no matter in what country :(

  • Hearing this breaks my heart. I really don’t know how anyone could commit such a terrible thing. Rest in peace little angels.

    • Jun Song on May 24, 2013 at 2:27 pm said:


      It’s just not fair. And the sense of helpless is overwhelming too. All we can do is wish everyone peace.

  • Melissa on May 24, 2013 at 1:47 pm said:


    Heartbreaking , hard to wrap your brain around that tragedy. Being a mom it truly difficult to understand. My heart goes out to the mother and family.

    • Jun Song on May 24, 2013 at 2:25 pm said:


      Yes, my level of awareness is so much higher now that I’m a mother myself. I can’t imagine what that family is going through right now and for a long long time.

  • I can’t even begin to process this kind of hateful and evil act. Stories like this one break my heart. There was a story similar to this one in the news awhile ago. A man named Josh Powell killed his two boys and himself by setting his house on fire. The police recently announced they’re giving up the search for the body of his wife. R.I.P. Ruben and Julian

  • This always breaks my heart to hear of the innocent victims, the child in all of this while not knowing the torment the parents were dealing with that they could no longer cope and ended it this way. The saddest news ever is to hear of the death of a child to me.

  • Oh my heart breaks. I cannot believe that any parent can hate their spouse so much as to kill their own children. There really are no words. R.I.P Julian and Ruben

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