Jun Dishes

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Big Brother 15: A Blessing and A Curse

I have not had the chance to watch last night’s live eviction episode of Big Brother 15 yet, although I know Nick is gone and Helen is HOH and Julie Chen’s hair is overtaking her body. So I haven’t seen GinaMarie cry a pagenat river over Nick’s eviction yet, and I haven’t seen Jeremy fail at HOH…

Because the hours following the actual episode have been so much more real and scathing…providing a glimpse into what racism looks like when nobody is watching:

I say “when nobody is watching” because people like Aaryn and GinaMarie are behaving as if there’s nobody watching, and probably behaving the way they do outside the house when they know nobody’s watching. So what now?

CBS is not to blame for there being racists in America, nor are they to blame for casting them. They cast based on personality types and IQs and skin color…then threw in some STDs and silicone and hair extensions…and there you have it.

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What CBS is to blame for is their failure to have some contingency plan for cases where white women and/or men in the Big Brother  house become hostile in their overt racism, and stresses of the house. If there are emergency plans for fires and earthquakes clearly CBS needs to have something for racists. I’m sure they will, after this season, but for now they’re doing their “best” to address some really  B I G  realities. Realities, as in this shit happens every day thousands of times a day outside of the Big Brother house. It just may be that you live somewhere “where this doesn’t really happen” or people have become better at hiding it in light of public consequences.

Hate in America based on a minority race is there when you’re born and while you live, and out-lives you for long after you’re dead. That’s racism. If you married or impregnated yourself into an ethnicity or ever had a friend or mentor of color, then you’ve probably witnessed some form of racism yourself and hurt just like everyone else hurts when someone they care about suffers senseless hate. I’ve noticed that these realities are mercilessly raw to some fans of Big Brother, while for other fans like me and any other fan of ethnic background this is nothing new.

BlogTweetThe important thing for everyone to take away is that one season of Big Brother will not end racism. Nothing will, but Big Brother will make or break people because of racism. It’s happened already and is happening now.

In real life I have to live with racists around me or living next door to me or shopping at the same supermarket as me, and I don’t always get the satisfaction of putting racists on blast like it’s happening on BB15. I can’t beat the shit out of racists on a daily basis but I can avoid them, and sometimes I can key their car in the parking lot or give them the evil eye in the hopes that their eyebrows fall out right in front of me. Sometimes I do confront these pieces of human trash depending on the specific situation, because we all pick our own battles.

In the house, you can’t get physical with a racist or wipe someone’s hat up and down your Cherokee crack, but you can be a racist. As soon as we understand this, we can better understand that those experiencing racism as an everyday occurrence and not just a hot issue of the summer, see this is a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing that more people are aware, but it is a curse because the closeted racists are becoming angrier and angrier like some stifled yeast ready to explode.

I’m not angry but I am aching a little inside thinking about Howard and Candice and Helen and their families having to go through more than I ever had to go through in a house that’s supposed to be part fun and part misery, but not racial cruelty.

PLEASE CBS call a house meeting and address this with the HGs.

Always dishing,

Jun

 

Posted under: Big Brother, Reality TV Dishes

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54 comments

  • Timoteo on July 12, 2013 at 11:19 am said:

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    I’m not going to lie I started to cry during the Howard & Candice conversation in the Have not room. As a black guy I related to that, and I could feel their pain. People should not have to deal with this on Big Brother. I’m glad you wrote this blog. And i’m glad the people in America that think everyone is equal since Obama is president is wrong.. they are so wrong. The TV show only gives you a taste of what is happening on the live feeds and in real life.

    Also i’m curious what was your take with Howard & Candice? Howard said to calm down and ignore it pretty much. and not let them get to her. And Candice wanted to go in there and fight back. I can see pros and cons to both of their points. But I think if Howard calmly goes to these people & talks about this racial issue with the people making the comments, I think they will stop. Amanda can’t do it every time because clearly it’s not working. When she told Aaryn to stop doing it, Aaryn started to play victim and cried -_- ugh.

    • Jun Song on July 12, 2013 at 11:25 am said:

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      I believe Howard is giving Candice sound advice in regards to dealing with racism in the Big Brother house. If they were not in that house Howard would be giving Candice different advice.

      Thank you for sharing Timo. Many of us are crying because it’s a reflection of our own lives.

    • McCraeOkay on July 14, 2013 at 3:07 pm said:

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      I don’t think Howard would be able to talk to Aaryn calmly about racism. He was afraid he’d explode all over them. He’s a strong man, internally and externally. I’m glad they have each other in the house.

      Jun, I just joined you here, but have loved you since your BB season. You’re a joy to read!

      Timo, I feel you. Growing up Jewish just north of Boston, I know a little about hateful and ignorant people too. Jeremy saying he’s getting Jewed more than a few times and Spencer voicing praise for Hitler make me nauseous. But Aaryn and Gina Marie going after Candice, and Howard’s emotional breakdown were heartbreaking. Maybe it will change some people to see the first-hand effects of racism.

  • iamrealitytvlover (@babstheshopper) on July 12, 2013 at 11:24 am said:

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    Very well said Jun. This has been such a horror to watch unfold tonight. The pain and anguish that Howard and Candice had to endure can’t really be understood unless you have walked in their shoes or similar ones. No one knows the chip in your soul this takes and that chip is taken whether you retaliate and fight back physically/verbally or whether you take the high road like Howard did and walk away. Each time this happens you lose a little piece of your soul. It’s a tough position to have to choose where you take a stand versus where you let it roll off your back.

    My real anger is at CBS for doing do little to intervene knowing that if tonight was the night that Howard lost his cool, he would have been evicted from the house, bore the blame and been as innocent as hell. Let’s just hope the angry tweets to CBS tonight are enough to prod them to take a more proactive stance to protect their houseguests from great harm to their spirit and psyche. Meanwhile it feels degrading for me to say this but I am human so I will……..revenge and justice will be served up when these bigots re enter the real world and find they are jobless and thought of with great disgust. Karma will be working at full throttle.

    You have a large follower base and I appreciate you taking the time to try to educate so many of the masses. That how the war on bigotry will be one, one teeny step at a time.

    • Jun Song on July 12, 2013 at 11:28 am said:

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      Thank you for your message. You bring up many valid points that need to be said. Walking in someone’s shoes is the only way to know certain things in life. But the fact that so many people who haven’t walked in such shoes are seeing and reacting like good humans is comforting :)

    • Heather on July 14, 2013 at 10:05 pm said:

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      Totally agree Karma is a bitch and those 2 little witches will certainly be treated to it when they leave the house. The sooner the better. Hoping this follows them for a long time. Wish they could learn from it but they are just too ignorant. Hoping Candace and Howard can hang in to see them sashay out the door. I have been so fortunate not to see ignorance like this first hand where I live in Canada. Of course I know racism is out there but God help anyone who acts like this in front of me.

  • Anonymous on July 12, 2013 at 11:40 am said:

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    I too cried watching the Howard/Candice conversation. It absolutely broke my heart. I am a white woman from the south and this season reinforces how insensitive, uncaring, thoughtless, etc that people are. As a Christian woman who knows the Bible and its teachings, I cannot express how much self-control it took for Howard not to say anything to those ignorant people. It would be “pearls to swine.” Howard and Candice literally did what Jesus said…when someone slaps you in the face, give them your other cheek to slap as well. Howard, if you by chance ever read this….you are amazing. I see racism every day where I live and it just about breaks my soul. The evil that “men” do is difficult to see, let alone experience in a place where you can’t escape. Please know that there are good people out there that see people as just who they are, not the color of their skin.

    • Jun Song on July 12, 2013 at 12:13 pm said:

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      I agree with you on Howard 100%. It’s hard for him not to act on such deliberated hate, but it’s not like in real life we can beat racism out of people either. Especially as such a large and easily intimidating figure Howard is doing well.

  • Anonymous on July 12, 2013 at 11:49 am said:

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    On a side-note. I have been watching Big Brother UK, people get kicked the heck out of the house if they verbally attack, demean and bully people. I wish our BB did that. The 3 of them would have already gotten kicked out and replaced.

  • I have thought about this a lot tonite and I thought I was going to make a long drawn our response to this. I find though that what I have to say is really irrelevant. As a white female I can really not weigh in on many of the thoughts and issues here. What I say would be useless anyway. It is what I can do that is the important thing and that is to be more aware of what I say and the impact my words might have even unintentionally. I am glad that this is being freely discussed and grateful for the knowledge I am obtaining from reading and digesting all that I see.

    I cried with Howard and Candace too and was made painfully aware that what might be one remark to me was a lifetime of like remarks for them. And that one remark just might be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. As I continue to ponder all this, I may have even more epiphanies about my own behavior past and future.

    I do believe CBS should intervene before true hostilities breakout. I didn’t really see a resolution tonite, just some venting and suppression of anger. It wouldn’t take much to make it boil over again.

    • Jun Song on July 12, 2013 at 12:47 pm said:

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      I don’t think any speech against racism is useless, and yours certainly isn’t. But your point on “I am glad that this is being freely discussed and grateful for the knowledge I am obtaining from reading and digesting all that I see,” is what separates you from those who are doing less digesting and more hating.

      Thank you for showing patience and open-mindedness :)

  • Anonymous on July 12, 2013 at 12:50 pm said:

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    CBS should be prepared from racism coming from anyone not just white people, while in the BB house.

    • Sure…but do you actually watch the show? In a typical season, there are typically <5 people of color in the house. If racism is going to occur on BB, it's typically going to be this way unless they also address casting diversity issues, too.

      • Anonymous on July 13, 2013 at 2:29 am said:

        Ridiculous thing to say. it only takes one person of any race to make a remark about sterotypes or anything to get the online community going. The online BB community isn’t the nicest bunch either. I have been around for years watching the live feeds and some of the things I see people say online is ridiculous. It was only a matter of time before someone like that got on the show. It just happened to be a few white girls this year. No ethnicity is above the racial stigma, there are ‘bad apples’ every where.

  • That video clip broke my heart. Howard is a class act, and he is confident that this will be dealt with ….in the house at least. However, you can see the conflict he has. CBS has to do something to stop the torment.

  • Forgot to ask this: Do you think Howard is getting fed information in the diary room about how people are reacting to the racist comments, and how some have already been fired? I am thinking that is the only reason he has been able to keep from losing his temper.

    • If that was in fact true, that would break a fundamental Big Brother principle of “no contact with the outside world” and it would create further controversy.

      • Anonymous on July 13, 2013 at 2:30 am said:

        Amanda basically confirmed last night that the whole house was being asked about Aaryns racism. Production does drop hints of certain things.

  • Dr_Media on July 12, 2013 at 2:28 pm said:

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    I think that CBS could be contemplating just what to do with the offending HGs. Do they wait and let what happens happen or react and remove. Part of the issue could be what to do with them once removed. Even though the offenders have dug their own grave CBS gave them the shovel.

  • Anonymous on July 12, 2013 at 3:13 pm said:

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    What happened was even more heart breaking..to see Howard totally break down and cry, and cry. He literally called out to the Lord to help him, give him strength and patience so he wouldn’t go “postal” trying to stand up for what’s right. Then to see him hold and comfort GinaMarie as she balled hysterically at the “loss” of Nick, so tenderly as she cried for almost a good 20 minutes. Howard is a stand up guy and I am saddened at what he has to deal with inside of that house. I will be praying for he and Candice. Something HAS to happen. How much are they allowed to take? Flipping over someone’s bed, throwing their pillow on the filthy floor as well as their clothes? And laughing as its done? SMH….

  • I feel that as soon as Aaryn started turning the bed over, that was a physical attack and it should have been addressed. She should have been made to redo the bed, and been given a penalty Have not status. What GinaM did was goading for a fight she too needed a reprimand from BB. There comes a point where too much is really too much and they have both crossed it. I know that this exist outside the BB house, but inside the house, people should not have to live that way. It was one thing that they were showing their nasty selves in whispers and giggles which is what happens on a daily basis, but once they started verbalizing their crap into the faces of the focus of their hatred it becomes an attack. Maybe not physical, but just as devastating .

  • Hellon88wheels on July 12, 2013 at 3:29 pm said:

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    That was incredibly hard to watch last night, my heart broke watching Candice and Howard but that’s the reality of racism. Although Candice and I have similar experiences going to a predominately white school my experience was not as painful. But It was just maddening to see the glee that Aaryn took in tormenting the house last night.

    With her being the least self aware person in the house, a unapologetic biggot and a Psych major. WOW! (And maybe thats her niché, for all white clientele who knows? Stranger things have happened.) What I do understand is that she couldn’t counsel the dust bunnies that are underneath my neighbors bed, much less a actual real live in the flesh human being. Let’s go even further and add pets to that list. The hatred Aaryn is carrying around is a disease and the public has seen its effect. I would hate to see her unleashed on the general public with a degree. It’s like a army of the mentally ill leading the mentally ill. Not good.

  • “If the Producers let them do this, then this is what they want to see.” Howard

    This. This was the pivotal moment for me last night. He said so much while saying so little. My heart broke for him at that moment. He’s challenging Producers to do the right thing, yet when you watch him say the words to Candice, you can hear the resignation in his voice that expects they’ll do nothing. It feels like CBS won’t be satisfied until they can give “Angry Black Man” to the TV public. Howard is incredible to be able to maintain his insight.

    How are these blows LESS hurtful than the ‘damage’ that caused Willie to get tossed out in an instant last year? CBS must do something meaningful to address last night.
    Personally I’d like to see Aaryn & Gina Marie removed from the house over the confrontation & THEN have that frank discussion with the rest of the HG’s.
    Thank you Jun for being so candid & sharing your unique perspectives.

    • Hellon88wheels on July 12, 2013 at 4:45 pm said:

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      I’m really torn about that one. On one hand I worry about everyone’s safety, mentally and physically. But I want them evicted not picked off by the producers. It says alot more to me if they come together as a group and get rid each of them. Anger can be more than fuel for your fists.

    • Wembeley on July 12, 2013 at 6:58 pm said:

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      Yeah the producer comment got to me too because it was obvious they weren’t going to do anything and that must make Howard feel really betrayed. I hope when he went in the DR they told him that they weren’t intervening because IT WILL BE AIRED to show what these people are doing and how well he is handling it. Because if it isn’t aired and there is no punishment I will be super pissed. I’ll be starting facebook pages and letter wrriting campaigns galore. I’m glad to see I wasn’t the only one who cried, it surprised me at first that I got so emotional but just seeing Howard be subservient to keep the peace and the bullies continuing their behavior and BB doing NOTHING just hit me to the core.

  • This entire season is gut-wrenching. Last night was a “last straw” moment, IMO. No person should ever be made to feel like Candice and Howard did. It broke me heart to watch them knowing that I could do nothing to comfort either of them. The discussions on racism and hate have been on target, but I do think there is another aspect at play, especially with Aaryn. To me it appears that her “racism” is fed by ignorance and entitlement moreso than hatred. I truly believe that if the BB house was filled with young, beautiful, white women, Aaryn would still find her prey. Whether it would be in the form of perceived obesity, vocal dialect, moral beliefs, financial stability or pretty much anything that Aaryn deems “flawed” I think she would attack in much the same way. Her complete and utter denial of blatant racism is uncanny. But I think it is ignorance, entitlement and upbringing that drive her. And yet our society continues to promote and pay homage to the “mean girls.” This is disgraceful. It makes me ashamed and embarrassed to admit my part in this debacle. Yet just like the train wreck, I keep watching.

  • Vicky Pelliccio on July 12, 2013 at 5:32 pm said:

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    Jun I grew up in the Bronx in the 70’s and my neighborhood was racially integrated with whites, blacks and puerto ricans. Everyone was nice and we all got along, but make no mistake that racism was alive and well, and even living in my house. Many comments about other races were said numerous times over the years by my parents, but I learned to form my own opinions about people. Not sharing their views was hard because I strongly disagreed with their beliefs and was often embarrassed for them and their small minded thinking. I hated the things they said, and often spoke up against it, taking the heat for not sharing their views. I have friends of many different races, religions, sexual preferences and often hear racial slurs against them. It disgusts me. I can’t imagine how you or any other minority feels when you have to experience it on a constant daily basis, but know that this white girl sees your pain, and although I can’t feel your pain, I too am hurt by it in my own way. Keep dishing girl!!

  • MarluvsBB on July 12, 2013 at 5:33 pm said:

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    I cried for them too. I was so proud of Howard. That has to be one of most gut-wrenching moments I’ve ever seen. I wasn’t watching a tv show at that moment. I was watching someone’s heart and mind trying to exercise self-control and overcome an intense desire to defend injustice. I also thought that Amanda’s exchange with Aaryn last night was the perfect example of how you cannot reason with an unreasonable person. Racism is not the only problem Aaryn has. She is so self-absorbed, she is blind to much. If I recall correctly, last night she mentioned that actions have consequences. She is the one who is going to need psych help upon her release of the house as she faces the consequences of her own actions. Howard always prays for her. I’m going to try and do the same,

  • stacy evans on July 12, 2013 at 5:34 pm said:

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    WOW I live in the south and I am White and husband is Black. We have been married for over 30 years. There are a lot of stories I could tell about things we have gone through and the heart break of your own family disowning you. I think that was the hardest blow. If your family is not behind you for support you kind of fill alone. We have each other and we are strong are we would never of made it for 30 years.You have to keep your head up and live your life.

  • Time to remove the scum from the pond. This is well beyond a social experiment.

    How are we supposed to ‘judge not lest ye be judged?’

    I know what I see and hear. I will not sit by and ignore.

    Judged.

    Verdict: Send them back to the rocks they crawled out from under then add a layer of cement with a monument atop. One large booted foot squishing the vermin from existence.

  • Another brilliant blog, Jun. I could not agree more. As someone that has been at the other end of similar trash talk, I ache for them as well…It’s disgusting behavior from anyone, but especially from people that are supposed to be educated adults.

    I read something very true today. Someone stated something to the effect (or is it affect? I can never get that one right, I apologize if I’ve done it again) “I bet her parents are very mortified because of her actions” to which someone else stated something like “where do you think she LEARNED it from?” And it’s true, that sort of racism isn’t bred, it’s learned, and it’s heartbreaking. Period.

    Sigh. Why can’t people be more kind to one another? Even just RESPECTING one another would be acceptable. So sad…

  • Leann (@_princesslilo) on July 12, 2013 at 6:13 pm said:

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    Beautifully written, Jun! I cried last night watching that moment when Aaryn openly mocked Candice and Howard gracefully picked her up. At first, I was upset that Howard didn’t want Candice to fight back, but it makes sense. Why stoop to their level? Aaryn, GM, and Kaitlyn will never be open minded enough to take in any argument Candice may have. Aaryn couldn’t even sit down and have an open adult conversation with Amanda about her remarks.She is always, in her mind, the victim.

    Aaryn will never see the error of her ways, because she was more than likely raised in that environment, where saying “funny” things against another race, culture, sexuality, religion is the norm. We are all a product of our raising. This incident teaches me that I need to raise my son, who will be born in December, to overlook physical and preferential characteristics that a person may have and love them for the human beings they are on the inside.

    It’s not just a race thing. It’s a humanity issue. Why do we treat our fellow brothers and sisters like they are beneath us? That is what makes me the saddest about this whole situation.

  • Howard was absolutely wonderful in so many ways. As a Black woman and mother, he made me very proud. I’ve had moments when I’ve had overt racism heaped upon me and my choice has always been to rise above it. Of course that’s a lot easier living in NYC. How freaking fantastic would it be if he won? Well, I’m getting ahead of myself.

    Great blog on the ugly sideshow of our favorite summer obsession.

  • It’s so frustrating because we should be talking about Helen playing a fantastic game. We should be talking about the letter she got from her husband. We should be talking about how she has kept a level head through all of this. We should be talking about how she is suddenly looking like a top contender to win.

    Instead, we are talking about the most heartbreaking and unacceptable thing to ever happen on this show. The sight of Howard praying and holding back tears is going to haunt me for a long time.

  • CBS may not be responsible for racism but they are guilty if they allow this to continue without throwing them off the show. NOT VOTING THEM out throw them out! Do not condone such despicable behavior on a game show. They wouldnt tolerate it on Wheel of fortune or any other game show. DISGUST if you dont do something!

  • Lynn Hanson on July 12, 2013 at 8:08 pm said:

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    I am a 58 year old white woman. I was born in the south but when I was very young my single Mother moved us to California…There I saw racism at it’s peak. In southern California (the LA area to be percise) the feeling of not being able to do anything about the injustices was overwhelming to me. I saw firsthand black people being made to drink out of their own water fountain, made to sit in the back of the bus, use separate restrooms…And I too cried like a baby watching Howard suffering through the pain. I absolutely hated this being brought into my frontroom. I have watched BB since the beginning and have never in today’s society, seen such disreguard to another human being. Took me back when we were a nation of ignorant followers. I have heard many say that Aaryn, Gina Marie, and Kaitlyn should be removed. But many are overlooking that Spencer has said the same sort of things, and that Jeremy is their ringleader ? Really for someone who is American Indian to sit and think this kind of behaviour is ok and laughable, is absolutely sickening. So in conclusion I have decided that just maybe this is our chance to educate our children on how not to treat another human being. Thank you Jun for providing a forum for this to be discussed.

  • Thank you for your post on this Jun, and I couldn’t agree more. I’m a 30 year old white woman from New York, so I don’t see a lot of this kind of thing on any kind of a regular basis. It was during the Presidential election last year that I had the mind blowing realization that racism is still so prevalent in other areas of this country, whether overt and angry or subtle and subliminal. I was shocked. Seeing this racism come to live in some of the kids in the BB house didn’t surprise me, as I realize now that so many people grow up around this as acceptable behavior. Sometimes, it’s just ignorance, sometimes it’s hateful, but it’s always wrong. The backlash to this kind of behavior (whether it be BB players or Paula Deen or whomever) gives me hope that more and more people are able to see this kind of behavior for what it is.

    What really saddens me is that usually, a social experiment like Big Brother should open people up to views and lifestyles different from their own, and it should foster a better relationship between people with differences, and serve to educate the ignorant about people of different ethnicity, orientation or backgrounds. Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem to be happening in this case. Furthermore, I doubt Aaryn will ever see her actions or her words for what they truly are.

  • I was really looking forward to your input on this, because I knew it would be the most honest, heartfelt reaction to what happened. You didn’t disappoint. I’m so hurt for Candice and Howard, but just as sorry for any minority that had to watch and remember their own experiences… and remind those of us who don’t live with it what it truly feels like. With each new generation, I think we’re becoming more aware of what exists and it’s improving, but we obviously have a loooooooong way to go. I’m proud to be raising my children to be as disgusted by prejudice as I am, and they confront any friends (they’re only 14 & 15) who speak differently.

    Much love and respect for you for sharing your own experiences and reactions.

  • I’ve never really been around anyone racist in my life. It makes me really upset when I watch some of the HGs make racist comments. If anyone wants to do something about it, there’s a petition on change.org asking for Aaryn to be expelled from the house. I signed it a long time ago. Aaryn clearly lacks self-awareness because when she was told to be mindful of her “jokes” about other races, her response was “I haven’t said anything racist.” The situation is out of control. BB needs to reprimand or expel her. I have an African American aunt and bi racial cousins. I’m extremely offended and upset these racist comments. I’m also offended by the homophobic comments but racism is more rampant in the house than homophobia. I agree with you, Jun. I hope they call a house meeting and address this with the HGs. We should be talking about Helen’s HOH win. Amanda and McCrae told Aaryn the truth about her ridiculous behavior last night. They made her cry. Aaryn has made so many people upset both inside and outside the house so it was nice to see her cry for once.

  • It breaks my heart to see so much hate openly like this. I know there is senseless hate in the world, and worse things have happened, but it’s heartbreaking to see it and it angers me even more when she (Aaryn) vehemently denies it, though, of course, if she proudly admitted it, it’d still anger me. Haha. On another note, she’s going to have a lot of serious repercussions in and outside of the house. She might never recover and part of me thinks “She deserves all of it” and the other part is just so sad that people act that way towards other people.

  • I cried. I am still crying every time the images of Candice and Howard’s pain flash thru my mind.
    I was screaming at Howard as Candice begged please don’t make me give up my bed. Her pleas hit me as she was begging- shadows of a painful legacy of “please don’t tell me to get up from my seat at the counter, to remove myself from my seat at the front of the bus.”
    I tried moments later to understand why Howard begged Candice to do that and truthfully have no right to judge him but the deep seeded anguish that request must have done to her is what absolutely guts me.
    Thank you, Jun, for your statement. I realize I really don’t get it as I will truly never experience racial discrimination. Only witness it. But will fight against it as best I can. Ever mindful to try not to cross over the cray-cray line. :)

  • It broke my heart to see Howard and Candice suffering together and Aaryn and GinaMarie going on with their lives as if nothing happened. However, seeing the makeshift bed Howard and Candice made in the Have Not room, separated from all the other house guests, made me cry. Shame on CBS and Big Brother for letting it get to that point. I sincerely hope America is watching and listening and people who are like the guilty house guests see themselves and how they hurt others. If this situation makes people more aware that minorities deal with this type of insidious behavior everyday, it will be worth the painfulness of watching it play out. Thanks for your insightful article.

    • Anonymous on July 13, 2013 at 2:34 am said:

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      I think Candice & Howard needed to be away from all the other houseguests. And when Elissa was not a have not but tried to pull the cushions off the seat to make a bed, they told her to ;Stop That’. So as sad as it was, and beings how there are not enough beds in the BB house, it was nice to allow them to at least get comfortable, but it was still yet sad.

  • Just wanted to say that there is no such thing as acting black. You can’t act black. You’re either black or you’re not. I’m black because my ancestors came from Africa. That’s what makes me black, not an accent, or music I listen to or etc etc…

    Anyway, I would have reacted either of these two ways:

    1. No reaction, got my shit and slept in another room.
    2. Aaryn and her cowboy hat would be at the bottom of the pool.

  • Barbara Lipensky on July 13, 2013 at 3:11 am said:

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    Maybe CBS will have to tell her about losing her modelling agency contract because or her racist and homophobic comments. I have found all of her comments offensive. She is incredibly beautiful on the outside and incredibly ugly on the inside.

  • Anonymous on July 13, 2013 at 4:12 am said:

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    As a white mother of a bi-racial child, it absolutely rips my heart out to see this. Candice is such a strong woman and I admire her game. She doesn’t compromise who she is at all. Even if it turns the whole house against her. I have so much respect for that. And Howard, as a black man, watching the ridicule and hate being spewed at Candice to be able to have such incredible calm speaks volumes about him as well.

    Karma will take care of Aaryn. She has shown that she is nothing more than a spoiled brat that has yet to see anything in the real world for what it really is. Sheltered and carried on a pillow OBVIOUSLY. She will get hers. And it won’t be at the hands of Howard or Candice but she will definitely get hers. It will begin when she gets out of that house and gets her first dose of reality… NO J.O.B. !!

    People like her are impossible to reason with. There is nothing that Howard or Candice could say that would break her, change her, hurt her, or make her see the light. To spend their energy on it would do nothing more than hurt and frustrate them even more. They have more class in their pinky toes than she does in her entire existence.

    Same goes for Gina Marie. For her to jump up in Candice’s face shows her bully mentality which is no less offensive than Aaryn’s mocking. She’ll get hers too.

    I just wish I could be a fly on the wall when they both see what they look like to all of us out here. I think CBS should put together a special reel for them with ONLY the clips of their racial outbursts and intimidation displays along racial lines.

    My son (8 years old) has not noticed the racism against him and I am so thankful. I have seen it. Even within my own family. But he is such a happy guy and so forgiving that he doesn’t even pay it any attention and chalks it up to “they’re just having a bad day”. I am so glad that where we live, there are more bi-racial families than anywhere I have ever lived before so he doesn’t feel like he’s any different. It will come some day. I dread the day, but I know it will come. I just pray that we have prepared him enough to do the right thing when it happens.

    As a white woman, sometimes I am so embarrassed by what I see by people of my own race do to others. We are no better. And I would love to see a BB with a VERY diverse group of people with Whites being the minority. Not that I want to see racism in any fashion, but I don’t think the white race should be the majority race that is represented in any venue.

    /rant ::sigh::

  • Lynda Perky on July 13, 2013 at 4:34 am said:

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    Seeing the built up pain and frustration in Howard’s face when he was alone after calming Candice down said it all. He has suffered abuse for years and had to suck it up and hold it in. We are not made to be able to hold crap in. Somewhere I heard him say or read that he had gotten help for an anger problem. Which of us white folks would not be beaten down and furious ready to snap? I just wanted to hug him and let him scream and vent.

    Howard and Candice handled the situation perfectly according to their personal needs. I can’t imagine taking that crap. CBS should have stepped in and stopped Aaryn, GM, Kaitlin , and Jeremy (who encouraged them while no other HGs were not looking) should have been moved into the have not room away from everyone else.

    I was pleased to see Jessie stand up to them Amanda was no surprise she is assertive.

    Thanks for letting me vent even though I have never and will never experience this.

  • It broke my heart to see Howard and Candice crying last night. I can’t imagine living in a house with people who use race as way to make themselves feel superior. I am an adopted Korean into a Canadian family. I knew I didn’t look the same, but my parents never made me feel different and the first time I experienced discrimination I was very confused as to why I was being singled out. I learned very quickly that racial discrimination is hate in its purest form and it’s a toxic power struggle.

    I am disappointed to see Aaryn and GinaMarie behaving this way because they are supposed to be from a generation of acceptance. Aaryn’s inability to understand how her remarks can be protrayed as rascist is the scariest part of the whole scenario. It shows a total lack of empathy and self awareness, she is incapable of learning and growing from this experience. I just can’t with GinaMarie! She has other issues then the discrimination.

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