Jun Dishes

verb/diSH/ : food or sex or gossip or fiction in real life

The Dating Game in Belgium

I can’t speak for all of Belgium, but as a general rule outside of maybe Brussels, I can tell you…

There’s no dating game in Belgium. Of course there’s the usual dating motions to go through and all the getting to know each other on the first date like there is in America, but here there are just less games. No games. Let that sink in, because it’s still sinking in for me even though I’ve been living here almost three years.

Being from New York City myself, I know the dating game in the city can be sadistic. I was Ms. Sadomasochist and the City herself. New York’s a city like no other and therefore the games played in dating must be like no other.

In a smaller country like Belgium and smaller city like Ghent, it’s logically milder the dating game. In fact, in many cases by the second date a couple is already “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” here. Like, Belgians say those words out loud to each other and about each other after just a few dates with someone. Can you imagine?

In New York it can take a structure of months of once-a-week dates before “the talk” ever happens. You know…the talk where the two dating people in question talk about monogamy and possibly the boyfriend or girlfriend word rears its epic head. I can count on one hand the number of boyfriends I’ve had. I need to count hairs on my head for the number of guys I’ve dated or slept with or had otherwise sexual relations with. Does that make the word boyfriend more sacred? No. It just means it’s easier to find sex than it is a boyfriend in New York. New York City, in fact, which is full of underground sex for sale.

Not here. Sex is for sale legally here, like much of the EU, so there’s less allure around it and less hype. Here, you can break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend and move out and have a new boyfriend or girlfriend within a week or two, or even days. I see people moving in together after just a month of dating. Egads. I’ve had discussions with Belgians my age and younger and older and it doesn’t matter. They think all the rules of dating in America is headache-inducing. I agree of course, even if I participated in it for years.

It’s not because the term boyfriend/girlfriend is less sacred in Belgium, but because here the rhythm of life is slower and less dramatic by default. Priorities are different. Breaking up and settling into a new relationship is like going from one end of a metal slinky to another, and letting yourself spill out into a new relationship at the end and that’s it.

It’s not to say there are no sluts or man-whores or psycho exes in Belgium. There are. I assure you. There are just less in proportion, and in concentration, than there are in the States. There aren’t “rules” here preventing you from calling somebody you like if you want to, instead of waiting a certain number of days or giving mixed signals and mind-fucking people. It confused me at first because my natural state of cynicism.

I’d never seen people who just started dating attending weddings and family gatherings right away. Shit, I think there are boyfriends’ parents I never even met, but here you meet everyone over a beer and you’re family asap. Woah.

I’m married so it’s not like I was a part of the dating game here in Belgium at all, but the mentality is something I’ve had to adopt socially. Even when I met my husband Davy randomly on vacation I knew it didn’t feel like a casual vaca-fling, but how could I be sure? What were Belgian dudes like? Why couldn’t Google tell me?!

We looked great in our vacation photos, but was it a sure thing?

boat

I chose to be sure, and I chose to fuck all my usual game-playing and to believe that Davy was sincere. Of course he had to do the same, knowing I was a New York brat who happened to also have won “Big Brother in America.”

Davy had to be sure too that I wasn’t playing him, and that our chance meeting in the tropics could lead to marriage. Would I really move to Belgium for him? Would he even see me ever again once we parted ways and went back to our lives after some time in the sun? His Belgian mentality ultimately took over, and nothing else mattered. I was his girlfriend. Just like that…there was that word!

I went with it. We did it. I’m not saying you should grab the next Belgian guy or girl you meet on vacation somewhere and say hallelujah hello marry me. Davy’s decision wasn’t merely a “Belgian” one, because meeting the right person knows no bounds. It’s not that simple, but I can tell you that the dating game here in Belgium is much simpler. You’re just with someone or you’re not. Oh, and a marriage certificate here is not required to live as a married couple under one roof. If you “co-habitate” then you have the same rights and titles as a married couple. Which is why I’m glad Davy and I married after all.

In case you were wondering…

Always dishing,

Jun

Posted under: Reality Dishes

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67 comments

  • Ugh. The games. And multiply that by about 100 and you have gay dating games. Do you know many gay guys there? Is it the same way?

    • Jun Song on October 2, 2013 at 4:10 pm said:

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      I do know gay men here…boys too…haha I don’t know if I can say definitively how the community is here. Gay rights is a stupid term to begin with, and rights here are equal for gay people. It helps to lead an open and proud life and most of the gay men I’ve come to know here are very grounded and family-oriented and settle down happily…so…yes, maybe less games here on the gay front too!

  • Geneviève Ryan on October 2, 2013 at 1:30 pm said:

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    so interesting, I love reading about the differences you noticed between Belgium and b New York!

  • vivi howe on October 2, 2013 at 4:44 pm said:

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    You make me laugh. As always your writing is witty and I look forward to your daily ramblings. I wish I had that gift.

  • That was an interesting read. And what a good looking couple you make (I love the photo). Apparently, Belgians are uncomplicated, know what they want and go for it. And no mind games. How glorious that must be.

  • Having lived over there in Europe for five years, it is strange that I hadn’t really thought about the difference that much

    But looking back, I realize what you described is how it is. It has been many years since I have lived there but as I mentioned in another response that my brother still lives in Germany. When I look back on his relationships, I realize once he knew his current girlfriend (and in one case wife) was about to be his ex-girlfriend/wife (note they were in the process of moving out or had moved out), he already had a new one.

    As to the rights of co-habitation, one thing I learned watching my brother go through the break-up of his marriage (she left him for someone else) or the break up with an ex-girlfriend, the courts are way, way more on the woman’s side over there. So much so that before he got married to his current German wife, he had her sign a pre-nup so that he wouldn’t get screwed again (he is not rich but did not want to lose the house he built), and a pre-nup that is not common over there and there were quite a few tense moments over that.

  • Thanks for writing this, Jun. I’m Canadian (and as an earlier commenter posted, I’m also a gay man), and although I’ve never been to the US, the “rules” of dating in Canada sound similar to those found in NYC.

    It’s refreshing to know that there are places in the world that are much simpler and straight forward than in North America. I’m finishing my final year of University, and I’m looking for places to travel to when I graduate in May. Your blog has opened my eyes to a destination that I would have never naturally come up with on my own to visit.

    I read all of your articles, and although I don’t frequently comment, I always appreciate your perspective and insight. I find the articles about Belgium culture especially interesting :)

    Best,

    Brett :)

  • So, so wonderful to read! And such a parallel story to my own. I met the most amazing Belgian boy when I was backpacking in South America, and we just fell head-over-heels for each other. And now that we’re both home in our respective countries, there’s the big “What do we do?!” question rearing its head. But getting to know Simon was refreshing and amazing – there were (and are) butterfly moments, innuendo, and all the happy falling-for-each-other games. But combine that with sincerity and honesty and respect and no bullshit, and there you have it. In the States (even here in a small little city like Portland, Maine), there is dating drama and often one person trying to make the other jealous or playing around with it all.

    Hope you’re enjoying Belgium – maybe one day we’ll bump into each other over there! Also, thank you for indirectly reassuring me that I’m not crazy for considering spending the rest of my life with this boy…

    Sophie

      • Pratik on May 5, 2014 at 8:50 pm said:

        I met this Belgian girl (or woman she was elder to me by two years) in china. We were there for company work. We spent 2 months there. It was nice bonding over daily breakfast and then weeknd outings, dinner invitations with lots of cultural exchange.
        On my last day prior to see off, I mustered all my courage to ask her out for a dinner since I was not sure if she has anything for me. But then the dinner night was well spent. Went to all possible late night outlets and stayed there till they were closing 😀
        Eventually we came back to our hotel around 3am. I asked her to come over since I had a small gift for her. Also plucked a small flower from a roadside plant(it was spring season) and I could see she liked it.
        Anyway after the gift we spent another hour chatting (already into 6th hour :D)
        Then there was that moment when we had to say good bye. Not knowing when we will see each other again. I was not sure how to react but then she asked me for a hug.
        It was tight one than I expected and then we kissed. She an inch taller to me. Better in kissing.
        But at that moment I really felt loved. We were all over each other with those compliments we had reserved to ourselves for unknown reason.
        But yeah after that I came back home and that’s it. I don’t see any initative from her side to talk. Sometimes it’s me who will drop an odd message.
        It’s hard to let go people you like no matter how much ever impractical the reality may be. I know she won’t be able to live with my culture and background. Life sucks at times. I just hope it was not a one time moment for her. I liked her a lot. Miss her.

      • Jun Song on December 1, 2014 at 9:16 pm said:

        Hi Pratik. It sounds like you two definitely had something special…at least enough to spend so much time together and feel so free. I don’t know what to tell you exactly, but I hope you’ve found some closure…

  • Maligirl on May 13, 2014 at 3:37 am said:

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    This really opens my eyes to his drops and comments, been puzzling me to say the least! I laughed my tail end off girl on your piece!

  • im glad i found this, i really dont have much dating experience and a couple months ago i took a trip to belgium because i want to go study there next year, anyway i got to met a couple of guys, thing went a bit further with one of them but in general i felt like i did not understand at all the intentions or feelings of those guys about me, it drived me crazy!! ultimately, i had to return to my country and 1 week after i left, he sent me a message asking me to keep being friends so i said of course and texted him every time i could but he barely answers to me so im like wtf! i was already away u didnt need to contact me again to not speaking to me, any way i keept thinking about him because there was this moments were he was very kind and loving to me, and i thought maybe it was not ok that i did not show him much afection back because i was a bit scared, i though he was just trying to fool me around. now i just keep thinking maybe i misunderstood everything =(

    • I’m sorry you have regrets Andrea. It’s true. It’s very hard to know what someone’s intentions are, especially when you’re in a foreign country. I hope you’re in a better place now.

      • andrea on December 2, 2014 at 3:52 pm said:

        I am.. back to Lima now 😉 but i think it is hard for me to date anywhere hahaha any way a few months later, i got unexpextely involved with another belgian Guy … Seems like belgium follows me >.< … This esperience got me even more confused about thèm… I mean i really had such a hard time trying to understand this Guy eventhough hi is amazing and i truly care about him, we r better as fiends now i think…i think i might be atracted to the fact they r not easy to read (for me)

  • Very true, about the dating games here in the states. I have stopped dating here in the states and I have been talking to a woman from Belgium online and will be visiting her soon. I can tell right away she was different. She is more genuine amd sincere. Thanks for the piece. It was very well written and enlightening.

  • Anonymous on November 28, 2014 at 5:07 am said:

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    Very enjoyable post! I appreciate all the tips :) I met a guy online and he lives in Belgium. He is the most sincere guy I’ve ever met, he is just so simple, no games. I live in US and haven’t been a relationship for a while, but anytime I would go on a date, it’s always a game. None of the guys I have met have serious intentions. I haven’t talked to my Belgium guy about where this is all going, but we did talk about visiting each other. And I don’t mind moving to Belgium for him.
    Was it hard for you to learn the language and adjust to a different lifestyle (I’m sure it was a big adjustment coming from NY)? Would love to hear back from you.

    • Hi Marta. Thanks for sharing your story! I’m happy you’ve met someone sincere :)

      The language is not an easy one, but if you attend courses it’s not so bad. The best way to grasp any new language though is to use it in everyday life. In the beginning I was SOOOO intimidated to speak Dutch with actual Belgians because I was so used to speaking it in my Dutch classes with people who were just as bad as I was :) Plus, my husband Davy and I spoke English at home most of the time so that didn’t help. Eventually we made a rule that we’d speak DUTCH ONLY on the weekends…and from there it got easier for me to be comfortable with speaking it with native speakers…

      Good luck…and keep me posted if you can! :)

      • Anonymous on December 3, 2014 at 3:33 am said:

        Thank you for your feedback. I might start with Dutch for dummies :) How do you like living there? Do you miss NY? Was it easy for you to find a job there?

  • It’s so unusual to find girls dating/married to belgians. They are not so many in the world, and after a deep search I found your history.
    So here is the thing, I was talking for long time to a belgian through e-mail, I wanted to learn dutch because I was moving on to Belgium at the time, he used to help me and so on. When I finally moved for Belgium we exchanged numbers and finally a meet/date has happened. We ate Fries together and then we went out for a Pub where we drunk a couple beers. That was a nice night and we have a lot of things in common. No kissing though. I still wonder if that was a date and how can I make the next step? Any tips? Haha, thanks.

  • OMG! I can’t believe I have found this article :) I only say my belgian guy write me on a chat liefje and I didn’t know how to interpret that, but now I’m sure and sooooooo happy :) :) hey there was only two dates 😉 thanks Jun

  • Anonymous on March 1, 2015 at 1:36 am said:

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    great article! I know! it seems like theres no comments about belgians anywhere on the internet, glad i found this one, i met my belgian boyfriend when we were traveling Asia, been together for a year already, always thought that about him. no games! truly its kind of like when they commit to an idea they stick to it! never had that before with guys from my own country back in Latin America.

  • Georgia on April 1, 2015 at 1:14 am said:

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    I really enjoyed your post! I live in Quebec and I met a Belgian guy here who I am super interested in. I had him over on Saturday night to hang out with my friends and I; it was a very chill night. When they left we stayed up even later just listening to music. It was a really nice evening and I felt a strong connection. However he hasn’t messaged me yet after that night and I’m not sure if he’s interested. Do you think that the fact he isn’t messaging me right away means he isn’t interested? Or should I just message him? I have no idea… It would be cool to hear your point of view. Thanks :)

    • Anonymous on May 26, 2015 at 10:15 am said:

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      The question was more from you. I you mentioned you live in Quebec…I am simply curious to know if you live in Quebec city or Montreal or some other parts of Quebec.

  • Anonymous on April 1, 2015 at 2:40 am said:

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    i´ve dated and meet belgians and i think u should message him if he hasnt done it yet.. some are kind of shy … message him with friendly vibes so he doesnt feel pressured =)

  • Anonymous on April 3, 2015 at 7:27 pm said:

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    This article helped so much. I am curious though how to know if a Belgian men are flirting or if they are into you? I recently met a young belgian online through a class collaboration we are doing with overseas students. My contact is mostly online. It is hard to gage. Feel free to e-mail me. :) I can use all the advice I can get right now.

  • Anonymous on May 27, 2015 at 5:28 pm said:

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    One thing to note on dating. I guess there is a +-3yr age difference and if it is more than an age gap than that it is an older man with a younger woman. :( I recently got my heart broken falling for a belgian guy over the 3yr age gap. I had no idea age difference is such an issue there. Fyi to others.

    • Anonymous on July 3, 2015 at 7:11 am said:

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      im sorry im not sure of what happened to you with this guy.. im interested because im 25 ans i feell for a 37 year old … i noticed he was kind of unconfortable with my age so … i wonder if its the same that happened to u ?

      • It is normal for older men to date younger women, but I guess it isn’t normal for older women to date much younger men. I’m surprised he was overly uncomfortable. But, maybe? I know they have the same friends and are close with families their whole lives. Might be why a lot of belgian’s prefer closer age gaps. I guess it goes with maturity as well.

  • Anonymous on July 3, 2015 at 6:18 am said:

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    Thanks for your posting. I’m from Vietnam but I’m so consider about dating with Belgian guy because I’ve just meet an Belgian guy recently and things seems go so fast. He has been travelled around East Asia for two months and I met him online. But its quite pretty because we know each other so lately, he had to get back to Belgium after our first date. He said that he loves me after few days we meet, and he decided go to get back to Vietnam after a month for working and living here. He told me that I’m the right one for him. He texts me everyday as long as he has free time. Said he misses me, loves me, and afraid of losing me…I feel soooooooo confuse because it have never happened so fast like that before. I’ve never trusted in”love at first sign” as well… And specially he’s not an old man who looking for young asian wife, he’s 29 yrs old with good job in Belgium, handsome and so tall Lol =]]]]
    I’ve been met few western guys in Vietnam before, they always playing game and fool around, some are good but its quite hard to find someone who are serious in relationship.
    Anyway, after reading your post I can understand well about dating with Belgian guy. I have good feeling for him as well. So I hope everything will be fine.
    Plus: I knew many peoples who dating/married with Belgian guy in Vietnam, and it always seems amazing with happy ending. =]

  • Anonymous on July 3, 2015 at 6:58 am said:

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    So, im moving to belgium next month and im a 25 years old single mom of two … and ive been wondering.. how open are belgian men about dating single moms and posibly setteling with kids that arent their owns? … ive been in belgium, alone and dated several guys but now that i´ll live there the chances of getting something serious are more, its not something that i specially look for right now but i think its probable that i meet someone o like so, now i wonder …
    what should I expect??
    anyone here that knows anything about this?
    thank u =)

  • Anonymous on July 24, 2015 at 4:12 pm said:

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    I had the total opposite experience. I am American, live in the U.S. My guy is from Ghent. He lives in Belgium, works in the U.S. At times. He contacted me every single day for 4 months from Belgium. I see him once a month in the U.S. He is extremely hard to read of what he wanted/wants from me. I waited to sleep with him, even though we had the most crazy chemistry out of any guy I dated and I had many opportunities. Finally, 2 weeks ago, we had sex. He contacted me every day after he went back for 5 days, now I have not heard from him for over a week for the first time ever. So now basically, I feel very used and like a U.S. Hooker. So maybe they are not different than US guys. I am suppose to see him in a month, since we will both be in the same area for work. We both need to go regardless if we speak for work in the same building, so we will probably run into each other anyway. I have a feeling just like an American guy, he will contact me right before that time. Obviously, it would be more about sex if he did and I don’t consider myself that kind of girl. So sad to say, I feel he is worse than an American guy!!! I also dated many Europeans from Denmark and Sweden, who treated me the best! But the Belgiuk guy I feel, disrespected the most out of anyone I dated. We are not young either. We are both the same age in our late 30s, both never married, both work very hard and travel a lot. Especially for that reason of age, I expected him to be more mature on the matter.

    • Anonymous on August 11, 2015 at 10:54 pm said:

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      Update, I was wrong about my situation and found out recently that is was all a miscommunication and wrong perception on my part. I guess being American, you expect Guys to all act the same as Most American guys would. if they are not calling they are not interested. I guess this is not for all cases. Now I wish I could delete my comment above somehow, but I feel much better it was just a miscommunication.

  • In less than 2 months away, I will be meeting my dream lover from Belgium!!! After sending him home from the airport twice, I can’t believe he still wants to visit me. We are crazy about each other! We tell each other, I love you. We talk about getting married. We met on line 6 years ago. After going separate ways for five years, he recently contacted me on Facebook. He is my dream come true! He is even interested in my daughter, he wants to be a family. I’m keeping my figure crossed this will be a never ending LOVE story!!!! This blog is exactly what I needed to let my guard down and really go for it this time! THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!! :) I will Keep you updated on what I hope to be a fairytale come true!

    • The fairytale never came true due to relocating issues…. My daughter refused to move to another country and he said he couldn’t move because of his job, house and family. I never felt this way about anybody but oh well…. I have no choice but to carry on. He said he wants to try and have a child with someone in Belgium before he gets any older. When he left he took my dreams with him…..

    • I met the sweetest guy online, from Belgium. He had plans of coming to the USA to be with me. One day he decided he couldn’t handle the pain of a long distance relationship, and I haven’t talked to him since. I miss him dearly and would love to get in contact with him again. I only know his first name, possibly the city where he’s from, his age, all the basics. Of all the guys I’ve ever talked to, I feel like he’s still the one. Completely heartbroken.

      • stephany on November 25, 2015 at 3:33 pm said:

        First I would like to say I’m sorry for your loss. I know how extremely painful it can be. One moment you’re up in the clouds and the next moment you’re face down in mud. I’m having a difficult time accepting it myself. If you ever need a shoulder feel free to email me at simovic5405@gmail.com

  • I met a Belgian man while on vacation in Portugal last month and we hung out a bit for a couple of days before I returned to the U.S. What I found so refreshing and appealing about his was his genuineness, warmth, spirit and respectfulness. There were definitely sparks between us – he said I gave him butterflies and talked about the strong connection he felt between us. He asked me to visit his city in January for a weekend social event and gave me beautiful hugs before I left (though we never kissed). We are both professionals towards the end of long, fulfilling careers and I don’t have the time to waste playing games. Since my return home we regularly text and email one another but I have to admit I have a hard time reading him and his intentions compared to American men, maybe due to cultural differences in dating and some things get lost in translation as English is probably his third language. I’m leaning toward visiting in January so sent him an email telling him I would not come to visit just for the social event but for us to spend time together to get to know one another better (of course I would get my own hotel room as I’m not a hookup type of person). I have never done something like this before so why not be direct and take a chance. I haven’t heard back from him yet so I’m conflicted. Your opinion would be greatly appreciated!

    • An update: my guy said he would be so pleased to show me his city and spend time together so we can get to know another better and complimented me on my character as well. I feel the need to explore this otherwise I’d have regrets. Yes, I am single with no dependent children, have the flexibility (self employed) to spend chunks of time in Belgium to grow a possible
      relationship. Interacting with him in person will help me figure out if a relationship is possible because I still have a hard time reading his intentions – I understand their version of getting to know one another may be formal and distant by American standards. So I plan to visit Brussels after all and have already made travel plans ( yes, we continually discuss the ongoing security issues and precautions in his city and US). If after this visit we decide a relationship isn’t possible I would still enjoy having him as a friend because he is a remarkable and kind person.

      • Michele on January 27, 2016 at 8:21 pm said:

        Update: Yes, my Belgian guy brought it up at our first meeting (very direct but not off putting so I suppose very Dutch) that he did not want to get emotionally attached in a long distance relationship. But as the week unfolded while I was there a shift occurred: he said he spent more time than he planned with me (he rearranged his schedule), enjoyed my company immensely more than he thought he would and lamented my visit was so short. Since returning home from my visit he has told me the same sentiments and initiated plans for my return in a couple of months to further get to know one another (due to his schedule and commitments we are talking about him visiting me in the US during the summer). There was definitely an emotional and spiritual connection which I believe caught him very much off guard (no, we were not intimate) and it was wonderful to be with a man with old fashioned manners, a true gentleman. At this point I cannot tell where it will go as we need more time together: whether it is a friendship or can blossom into a long distance relationship as there is a need to find out what the perceived obstacles are and if they can be resolved.

  • My Belgium man was also a prince charming!! He was perfect for me and I swear I would have done anything for him! He was so kind and full of life. He even called me his little princess… It will probably take a lifetime to get over him… If you are single with no children, I say, go for it!!! This may be your only chance with such a great guy! In my opinion, It is better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all. Good Luck!!

  • I found your blog on google as I was researching about dating a Belgian guy. I met him on a dating site, it took me 2 weeks to decide as to whether I go out with him or not. I remember his message, “let me be the last time you try dating.” I thought he was joking, but gave him my number and we immediately set a day as I was to travel in a few days. I’m a single mother of two boys, currently going through annulment. I’ve had my fair share of this sadomasochistic style that is dating in England, full of men who are fucked up by previous relationships and so they try to dish it out on the next women they date!

    Over dinner with this Belgian guy on our first date, he said.” As of 6:45pm in a relationship and I have two children.” I nearly choked on my pasta! I knew instictively that he wasn’t kidding but I have to be sure as well, so when he missed my phone calls over a span of two days (while I was travelling on a plane with different time zones and wifi at my stopovers) I sent him a “best of luck” text I usually send to men who I am pissed at when they try to play the “game”. He immediately called and apologised over and over, set the time when we’d talk everyday so he won’t miss it, and booked our “honeymoon” (that’s his term) for the weekend of my arrival.

    I mean I still couldn’t believe it and it feels very unsettling having gone through many dates. But let’s see how it goes!

    Anyway thank you for writing this, this clarified the no-nonsense approach of Belgian guys when it comes to women!

    • Wishing you the best J as you get to know him better; it’s such a relief to drop the game playing and be one’s authentic and genuine self.

  • Michele on March 25, 2016 at 3:43 am said:

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    Although my guy and his family are safe with this recent tragedy my trip to visit him next month is postponed indefinitely; we are felling such sorrow for the victims and their families and the country.

  • Anonymous on April 4, 2016 at 3:55 pm said:

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    I am in love with a Belgian college student in his fourth year in the US. I had seen him around but could not figure out how to meet him and finally took a direct approach. We ended up sleeping together on the first date-something totally out of character for me- and it was beyond fantastic. We have been together twice since then. My problem is that I feel I am getting mixed messages from him now. Not much communication in last 2 weeks, but he is extremely busy and has a lot going on with his career choice. When I initiate contact, he seems to still feel very attracted to me. Do I tell him how I feel and that, when the time is right, to contact me? Or is he trying to tell me to get lost? Thanks for your input!

  • Olivia on June 6, 2016 at 4:14 pm said:

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    Hi. A belgian approached me in a hostel here in manila..We spent only 2 days together but it was unforgettable for me… and now he is back in belgium and we are chatting everyday! He is the kind of man ive been looking for..He is very smart and sensitive , patient loving and thoughtful.. and a gentleman.. I want to move there and am looking for a job.. and googled about Belgian men.. after reading this its confirmed …im moving to Belgium!! Thank you so much.. looking forward to crossing paths with u too!

  • Anonymous on June 14, 2016 at 2:25 pm said:

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    Belgian girls are great – very honest, down-to-earth and not superficial in the least. There’s also very little disparity between the sexes because of some of these factors. For instance, girls wear little make-up, don’t overdress often and there’s little expectation that the guy will pay or take the lead for example. I like that lack of expectation it tends to blend the sexes into one whereby neither’s role is assumed. Belgians, guys and girls, also like to go out but don’t go on about it, are culturally aware, well-read. like good food and wine and nearly all quietly intelligent linguists.

  • Anonymous on July 30, 2016 at 11:28 am said:

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    I’m struggling to read the Belgian man who seems to run hot and cold on me. As aUS expat living in Italy, I met this man through work. We’re both over 35 and had immediate chemistry. i only saw him as a colleague but he initiated more personal messaging and calling. The next time we were in the same city for work, he took me out for a drink to get to know me better. Instead, he told me about his unhappy relationship that he wants out of (girlfriend, not a marriage). This was over 4 months ago. He still calls me every day, usually on some work pretense but then talks for an hour about all sorts of subjects. When we must be in the same city for work he flirts heavily and often tries to arrange a more intimate setting for us to meet but then backs out at the last minute with a variety of excuses. I’ve told him off a few times and said he should stop wasting my time but he continues to tell me he wants me. Now he is even telling me I should meet him when he travels for work even though I am not needed on those client visits. By American standards , he’s acting like a player . I haven’t given yet, either. I guess I’m playing it just like an American – nonchalantly and with few expectations. He just returned from vacation with afore mentioned gf and called me more flirtatious than ever. Normally, I would completely blast him out of the water long before now. However, we work together on projects and I must maintain a professional relationship. My attempts to put my foot down and keep it just professional are always overlooked. In all honesty, there is undeniable sparks between us so I admit I have let him wear down my resolve to keep things strictly professional after each rebuke. But I don’t know any man who would be so persistent and yet never have any follow through over so many months. What is his game?

  • Michele on July 30, 2016 at 3:42 pm said:

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    He’s a player. ” Unhappy” yet went on vacation with his girlfriend!?! He hasn’t ended his relationship and approached you with a clean slate. Player. When possible confine business communications to email, end phone conversations when he segues from work to personal talk. Yes you may have chemistry but unless you want to be his snack on the side he’s just a player.

  • I’m belgian and I have to admit that this was very accurate. A lot of the people I know got in an official relationship after the first date. I had never thought before that this was different from any other country, but apperently I’ve been wrong … Feel free to ask me any questions if you want to know about our culture, I’d love to explain it to you all.

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