The Night Shift

My husband Davy’s worked the night shift twice this week. He drives big machines that scare me, at the Port of Ghent. He’s a docker.

Davy doesn’t do night shifts very often anymore like he used to, although it pays well, because it takes a lot out of him. It blurs two days into one because the shift starts at 10pm at night and ends at roughly 6am the next morning. His personal time zone is off, and it’s draining. Since Noah’s been born, everything’s a little more draining by default. Active parenting is tiring, but it’s the kind of tiring that magically disappears when Noah’s learned a new word or when he lays on us a sweet random kiss.

But two nights this week, Davy’s worked the night shift and come home in the early morning. He works so hard. He’s always worked very hard.

It’s not been easy choosing to stay at home to care for Noah, and Davy shouldering the brunt as main breadwinner. It’s not been impossible either. We’ve made it this far and Noah’s bright, and pretty brilliant for just a year-and-a-half old. We know we made the right decision to sacrifice some luxuries so Noah could be at home with me. I’m being biased and unbiased about all of this. But we’re not rich. We have no debts, and that’s what’s most important.

My winnings from Big Brother are long gone, for those who have asked, because prize money should never just be just kept sitting in cash. But I’d trade everything I did with the $500,000 anyway, just to have my dad back and my grandfather too. If only money could buy life.

Money can’t buy life. Living is worth more than any money. While Davy works I write. I write these blogs, and I write letters I will never mail, and I piece everything together in the hopes of making a bigger difference to someone one day.

It’s not easy being married to a writer. It can’t be. But then again it can’t be all that easy being married to me to begin with. Davy seems to make it look easy. I’m lucky.

I hope one day he never has to work another night shift again.

Always dishing,

Jun

24 Comments

  1. MarluvsBB

    Davy is definitely a man to be respected. Without respect, there is no love. You’re very blessed, as is he, with you and Noah. I love your little family, and so enjoy your blogs about them. I admire your choice of staying home with Noah. They grow so fast, and these moments will be finished in the blink of an eye. I know you both treasure each one.

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  2. I am glad you get to be home with Noah. Night shifts, “Graveyards” suck for everyone. 7pm-6am Mon-Thurs nights for 10 years is what Heath works. Plant shift work here is 6-6.

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  3. We lived through three years of nights and its hard on everyone. I babysat for spending money. I learned that those mornings the kids wouldnt be quiet i took them to the library as quiet time for the other to sleep and I went to free museums and even just walking in the mall buying nothing more than something to drink. sometimes it gave me more time with the children than i would have at home. your a great mom and wife. dont be so hard on yourself. hugs

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  4. I feel that one day, sooner than later, you will have much financial success with your writings ….whether a fictional novel due to your great, creative mind and/or cookbooks honoring your family. You are destined for stardom, which will bring fabulous income! Then, you, Davy & Noah will truly enjoy life while we get to enjoy your thoughts, hopes and dreams via your writing. A win-win for all of us!

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  5. I always thought a man who will do anything to provide for his family was VERY sexy! My mom was a stay-at-home mom all my life, and the values she instilled in me are with me today. I bet when you’re old and gray you won’t be saying “I wish I’d made more money when Noah was little.” You’ll be thinking about the wonderful man he turned out to be.

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  6. jenn

    I was married to a man that worked the night shift for 20 years. Its awful and it is hard on everyone not just Davy. You then have to take on all the load and Noah misses his Daddy. Hopefully Davy will not have to work any more night shifts. Hope you noticed I said WAS married I think the night shift help end our marraige that was good at one time.
    Keep dishing Jun

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  7. ONE MORE TRY: I just recently found your blog through my love of Big Brother (since Season 1-I skipped 1 or 2 seasons when I was too broke to have cable)…also, I recently became an ‘active’ Twitter-er (is it ‘Tweeter’?) to follow some of this season’s HG’s. I literally have only 1 follower, my loyal fiancé, because I set the account up solely to help me in the online game I used. I am pretty much ‘old school’ and, as a teacher, I haven’t had much time to fiddle around with actually posting tweets. I’m still getting the hang of hash tag #’ing (when to do it & what to say continue to be 2 of my biggest quandaries with the entire concept of Twitter), and I am not sure my tweets even get read by the person with whom I am trying to communicate! For real! I guess I need more practice, and, just like anything, I’ll figure it out in time.

    My question to you is, I’ve been thinking about writing a book…targeting an audience of middle school aged children who have autism. I have many years of experience teaching them academics, life & social skills and have come to learn that there aren’t that many good ‘age appropriate,’coming of age’ chapter books (with pictures; autistic people are extremely visual) that are actually interesting for them. My question (finally!) is: should I pitch the idea to a publisher first before I write? Or write, try it out with my current students before I talk to someone? Also, do you have any idea what publishing company might be interested in this type of book? I love ❤ reading your blogs & would appreciate your guidance (since I admire your style of writing so much)?

    Thanks for always dishing for us!
    Best wishes,
    @cathleenbish (I follow you on Twitter & like you on FB)

    Reply

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