Even Before I Got Engaged I Didn’t Like Cats

I’m not writing this to offend cat lovers. I have no business writing about cats since I don’t like cats. I got clawed when I was 6 years old. Me and cat’s don’t mix. Allergies.

But a reader recently asked me if I’ve “ever blogged about cats.”

No I haven’t and not until today…

Today marks the day 3 years ago I woke up and took this photo (Facebook comments cut out for privacy):




That was one of Davy’s cat.

My husband Davy owned two cats before he married me. The cats hated me. I believe they hated me because they were trained by Davy’s ex-girlfriend to hate me before they ever met me or they knew I disliked their kind to begin with, probably the latter.

Davy’s cats shed a lot and they were fat and old and diabetic. They were there before me but I didn’t care. And on this particular morning 3 years ago when I awoke and was greeted by that cat pictured above, I was terrified. According to Davy, who laughed at the photo, his cats never looked at anyone like that before. Ha.


Davy’s cats, who shall not be named, circled around above me ALL MORNING that morning and they kept following me from room to room on tops of cabinets and the fridge and bookshelves, etc. Davy’s feline beasts maintained height advantage over me and watched me like hawks. I felt like at any moment they’d swoop down and take my eyes out.

It’s like they knew…

Davy’s cats must have known that morning that Davy would propose to me on bended knee.

November 23, 2010.

It was exactly 6 months after Davy and I first laid eyes on each other in the Dominican Republic. Davy had remembered. He always remembers.

And he’ll never forget that on the day I said yes I also told him that his cats had to go (not right away but hours later after the proposal). I’m not a monster. Not only was I allergic to them but they were plotting my death. The pills I popped to help with allergies made me drowsy and I didn’t trust those cats while I was drugged up.

I was visiting Belgium for the 5th time in 6 months and spending Thanksgiving with Davy and not with my family in the States. His cats made me feel unwelcome to say the least, and so I told Davy to make a choice. Not really. I really did say the cats had to go.

This is where we get all the “exchange one pussy for another pussy” jokes…

So I returned to New York engaged. The next month Davy made the trip to New York, married me then we honeymooned, and I left New York behind for Belgium. The cats were gone when I got here. They went to a good home so calm down.

Davy chose me.

This morning instead of evils cats on Davy’s lap, there’s this little man:


So I don’t want to hear any shit after this blog about my not liking cats.

Always dishing,



Davy, I love you and of course I’d say yes to you all over again.



  1. When my husband and I met, he had a cat named Basic that he had for several years before he met me. I had also just gotten two kittens. I loved cats (no allergies or anything), but Basic HATED me. She was very protective of my husband. One night I woke up at his apartment and she was sitting beside me on the bed, STARING at me and started hissing. I was terrified! Well, we ended up getting married, and his cat moved in with my two male (much younger) cats. They didn’t really get along with each other but they managed. It too my husband’s cat Basic just over SIX YEARS to start loving me, jumping on my lap, etc. Before that, she hissed and scratched and only wanted me for food. But finally she came around and I loved her just as much as I loved “my own” cats. Unfortunately, we had to put Basic to sleep a little over a month ago. We miss her so much. Her and I really started to bond the last two years of her life. I laugh when I think back about how she hated me for so long. It reminds me of how Davy’s cats hated you. Cats are so territorial and they totally saw you as a threat!! Do you like dogs, or are you not an animal person? You know, I had an idea once that they should put two dogs that need adopted in the Big Brother House each summer. It will give the house guests something to do (play with the dog!), people watching would like it (everyone loves cute dogs!) and then at the end of the summer, they would get adopted, because who wouldn’t want one of the Big Brother dogs!? That’s my crazy idea. 🙂

    1. Jun Song Author

      This is a brilliant idea.
      Six years is too long.
      I’m not an animal person but I’ve owned dogs (and hamsters and rabbits) before.

      I had no idea you were married! I love getting to know you Meg 🙂

  2. When Bob proposed to me, he had 4 cats and I am allergic also; finding this out after I went to his allergist. He felt so bad because I was so miserable. He got rid of two to friends and the other two became outdoor cats. One cat became a wanderer and came back every so often, the other I gave away to my friend’s mother after Bob passed away.

  3. debchr

    That cat really does have a mean look to his face! I can see why you wouldn’t want to live with him! lol You have to draw the line, somewhere…! You were getting his Davy-love/attention, and he was jealous! He knew you had Davy’s heart! lol

    Growing up, we never had cats because my Mom was afraid of them. Many years ago, I once lived in a cool old home that had actually been built as three complete apartments with separate entries (by a three-family Mormon bigamist in Utah). The people who lived in the basement apartment had a roaming cat who visited me and once crapped in a plant then strew the dirt around to cover the ‘hockage.’ Plus, cats made me a bit nervous because I didn’t understand them, so I didn’t like cats, either, for many years – until I was your age or a little older than you, Jun. (Just sayin’… lol)

    During my late thirties, my stepson came to live with us full time, so we spent a lot of money on having his cat dipped and vaccinated, buying feeding supplies and toys and an airline ticket to get him to us. “Spike” (a dog-sounding name given to a cat by a little boy – lol) arrived, salivating heavily. He looked at me so pitifully that we bonded instantly. My heart went out to that sweet cat who gave me pleasure for several years.

    Fast forward about a decade to when I remarried a man who had an indoor-outdoor cat. “Austin” died at the age of 22 after I had loved him for about 5 or 6 years. My husband and I were devastated and literally cried for most of a week. My husband had heard that an animal adoption agency was having an adoption of female Bengal cats that had been donated by the family of a breeder who had died. The breeder had paid about $1300 for one of the cats, a white one. I was told this, but I knew nothing about Bengal cats other that what I’d read online before going to the adoption; I didn’t care about the value.

    I told my husband I feared that going to the adoption would break my heart about losing Austin. He said, if we became upset, we would leave. I told my husband that all the black and white cats I’d ever been around seemed friendly, so we thought we’d see if there was one there. It turned out that only one cat other than a Bengal was there, and she was black and white! We went to her, several times during the event, and she looked like Davy’s cat – like she was full of hate and about to spew piss and vinegar! She hissed at us, each time we checked back with her. The ‘hisser’s’ foster mom kept pushing her on us, telling us how sweet she was, until she finally began pissing me off. I ended up telling her that I absolutely was NOT going to take a cat into my home that hated me! Brrrr! You see, I DO understand how you must have felt! lol

    I had narrowed the cat selection down to a red Bengal (not a desired color for a Bengal, but she is gorgeous to me). She’s amber with black stripes and white around her eyes and in a small area on her neck. She kept biting at the stone on my ring and brushing up against me. She was also okay with being held. I told the agency that I was probably getting her, but hadn’t bought her as yet, when another couple tried to buy her out from under me! Well, that sped up the process! The agency gave me first dibs, and I chose to get her. I would strongly encourage anyone suffering from the death of a pet to get another pet, because all the pain we were feeling inside from the loss of Austin turned into instant love for Buffy. It was magical! No pain – all gain!

    A month later, we got a cat very close to the same age (4-1/2 months old) to be a companion to Buffy when we were away, but it turned out that Buffy likes people better than cats. Buffy’s companion, Bunny, turned out to be the absolute love of my life…! She’s a gray, short-legged, mostly Abysinnian mix. A few year later, a cat came up to our door, that we ended up keeping when my husband fell in love with her. She’s a tall, very lively white (with black spotting) Oriental. Only Buffy HATES the younger cat who relishes in upsetting her. All she has to do is get fairly close to Buffy and look at her! lol Buffy now (literally) hisses, growls and – yes – barks at Twiggy, the younger, frisky cat. Maybe in three more years, they will be companions, but I seriously doubt it after keeping them separated (for my peace of mind) for three years! However, Bunny and Twiggy are great buddies. Buffy likes to hang out in our office in the daytime, while Twiggy likes to stay out on the porch. Bunny gets along with both of them, so she goes where she damn well pleases and owns the house, yet she has the sweetest disposition and most loving nature of all the cats…

    Twiggy is very entertaining, though. She will sit on command and wait to catch treats – and manages to catch about 1 out of about every 3. I always get a kick out of seeing this. She will allow some cuddling and holding, but not for very long!

    This non-cat person is now a crazy cat lady! Oh, we also have a dog, Sam, who is a Vizsla (pronounced vee-shla, a red dog with yellow eyes – a Hungarian bird dog – OMG). Now, HE gets on my nerves, and I used to consider myself a dog person! lol He’s a very sweet dog, and very beautiful, but he has some annoying traits – like chewing up his room when we’re gone for even a short period of time. Now that I think about it, in the few areas where we have carpet, the cats are using it to sharpen their claws, so they’re all destructive of our home… That’s the worst of pet ownership for us, but we’re old and childless, so our animals are our babies and constant entertainment. At some point, we will replace the carpet with another surface, and when the dog is gone, I don’t want another. We’ll then replace the destroyed wood trim, etc. in that room…

    See what you do to me, Jun? You make me want to have a conversation with you. You’re GOOD! lol

  4. Laurie Braaten

    To Debchr: I have four dogs, one a Vizsla. That dog is the smartest animal I have ever encountered in my life. They only get destructive that out of boredom. And if you find her annoying and don’t have the time/energy to take yours for walks/runs and play with her, you should find a home where they can give her the attention she needs. they’re nothing like cats; they need interaction and exercise.

    1. debchr

      Hi Laurie.

      I can tell that you think we ignore Sam, but that is not the case. We play with him, and my hubby walks him several times a day. (I don’t walk him routinely because of an ankle injury.) We take him to a dog park when we have the time. He’s only destructive when we leave him alone, closed up in his own room because we don’t dare leave him alone with the cats! He’s able to jump the fence, so we’re afraid to leave him in the yard when we’re gone. We do give him love and attention. We take care of him and feed him top quality food. All our animals are rescues, and he came with separation issues. He only does this when he’s alone for about an hour. With leave him with plenty of food and water, a pheromone diffuser and toys, but he still occasionally chews the woodwork when we’re gone. We even take him with us, when we can – but there’s times when he has to stay behind, and those are the problem times.

      1. Laurie


        No I can tell you are the kind of people that love your pets, so I didn’t think you ignored him. I just know Vizslas, and they have a lot of energy and get bored really easily because they are so smart. They need more stimulation than most dogs. I’m lucky to have my son, who takes ours out to run and wear her out regularly, because I see her get really stir crazy if she goes even a couple days without that.

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